Golf Jokes

Golf is a great game – but have you ever stopped to wonder why only people who are rich or in certain types of businesses play the game? Despite the fun times we have had on the course we can’t help but make a few jokes about the game and its players.

Golf Course Promises

Four married men went golfing one Saturday morning. When they reached the third hole the first guy told the others how hard it was for him to come out and play.Golf Jokes

“I had to promise my wife that I would paint each room in the house next weekend,” said the first man.

“Well I had to promise my wife that I would build a brand new deck for the swimming pool,” said the second man.

“That is nothing!” said the third man. “I told my wife that I would remodel the kitchen.”

They started up playing again – but then they realized that the fourth man hadn’t said anything. They asked him how bad he had gotten it and what he has to do.

The fourth man said, “I set the alarm for 5:30 a.m. I shut it off, nudged my wife, and said that it was either ‘the golf course or intercourse?’ She told me to wear my sweater.”

One Liner Golf Jokes

  • When trying to play good gold you have to hit the ball hard, straight, and not often.
  • You can do three things to help improve your game: start taking lessons, practice all the time, or you can
    start cheating.
  • You can spot an amateur golfer when they are going up to the ball twice. Once to swing and the once more to swing again.
  • Most golfers prefer to use a cart over a caddy because it does not have the ability to laugh or criticize.
  • Golf is a game where the slow people are in front and the fast ones are behind.
  • Golf is a five mile walk that is broken with many disappointments.
  • During golf you go out with three friends, play eighteen different holes, but come back with three enemies.
  • Golf was the only name for it because it is the only four letter word that was left.