Wedding Jokes

Getting married is considered the best time in your life. Many women take this day to beautify themselves and have a princess wedding that they will remember forever. Bonding yourself with one person forever can seem like fun at the time – but as with everything in life it can sometimes feel overwhelming. Why not take the edge off with some great wedding jokes!

Doilies And Keepsakes

When Edna and Bob got married they bought a small home on a ranch. When they arrived the day after their honeymoon she placed a box on a shelf on her side of the closet and told Bob that he was not allowed to open it.

Fifty years went by and Bob held up his promise to never touch it. But one day while Edna was old and on her deathbed he was putting some affairs in order and ran across the box. Thinking that it was important he opened it and was surprised to find two doilies and $82,500 in cash.

He took the box to Edna and asked her what it was. “My mother gave it to me when we were married,” she said. “She told me that when I was upset with you to make a doily.”

Bob was happy to realize that in fifty years she only got upset with him twice. “So what was the $82,500 for,” he asked.

“That was all the money I made selling the other doilies I made.”

In Case Of Emergency

A newlywed couple had decided to spend their honeymoon out at the lake house. One day they went out fishing and the husband operated the boat. The next day he decided that his new wife should learn how to operate the boat in case of an emergency.

“Take the wheel honey and pretend that I am having a heart attack.” She took hold of the wheel and safely drove them back to shore.

That night they were sitting down and watching television together. The wife looked at her husband and said, “Honey pretend I am having a heart attack and cook dinner and wash the dishes.”